Heavy

I try to keep my blog as light hearted as I possibly can, but today my heart is sad and I must share with you what's been going on in my life.

Last year, my dad was diagnosed with stage four esophageal cancer.  They caught it very late in the game as it had spread to his bones.  Initially the doctor's were optimistic;  dad started chemo and it seemed to slow the spread of the cancer.  Our spirits were up, our hopes were too.  But then, he started getting a running string of pneumonias and has been in and out of the hospital.   The cancer spread to more bones and he was in a lot of pain.  They stopped chemo to try radiation just to help with the pain.  They had to put a stint in because the cancer had grown so much that he could no longer eat or drink. Throughout this whole nightmare, my dad remained optimistic.  This past weekend, dad took a turn for the worse and went back in the hospital.  We were hopeful that things would turn around like they had the past few times, but my dad isn't going to get better this time.  He's tired of fighting.  He's ready to be called home.   Honestly, I can't blame him.  He's in a lot of pain and has put up a good fight.  Tonight, my brother, my mother and I called in hospice where my dad will be transferred tomorrow.  It sucks.  This is the worst decision I've ever had to help make. 

So, if my postings become a little sporadic in the near term, I apologize.  I'm dealing with some pretty heavy stuff right now.